I've thought for some time that I should explain my Blog's description, seeing as it could come across very... well, arrogant.
This chapter of scripture is one of my favorites (Is. 55), and has become such through a series of events in the past year. My first memory of hearing it began in a morning chapel at Trinity-where I graduated this past December with my Nursing degree. That same year, I was asked to help organize a couple of our Sunday Night Alive Worship meetings. When it came time for me to lead one week's SNA, I was reminded of the significance and relevance of this passage in Isaiah to our gatherings as a body of believers. Many times in that past month I had come before God broken and humbled, so in need of His grace, and He would gently remind me that He is always ready to receive me-no matter where I've been.
When that Sunday evening came, I prayed that God would welcome each individual into our meeting to realize that they don't have to fight to succeed and be "good enough," but that they can come into His presence just as they are, and all because of Christ. As a university student at a private liberal arts school, and in the highly competitive nursing program, I constantly felt pressure to do my best to achieve in academics and everything, as to honor God. I had many conversations with others who felt pressure to please. So many times, I fall to my knees under this pressure, as God reminds me that I place this pressure on myself, and that He expected so much less of me, again because of Christ. He's just waiting for me to come to Him, not to finish my list of achievements first, or present myself clean-He makes me clean when I come.
That night I asked other students in the room to come forward and share their own stories of God's work in their lives, so that others could come and listen. Then I shared my own reflection on what "come and listen" meant for me. We introduced the song "Come and Listen" by the David Crowder band. This song repeats these words: "Come and Listen, Come and Listen to what He has done." I wanted that night to be an opportunity for us as a body of believers to come together and share what He was doing, and to listen to what He was doing in our brother's and sister's lives. In our individualistic culture we can get so caught up in ourselves, our goals, and becoming who we believe we want to be, or our parents, our boss, our teachers, or God wants us to be. We forget that God calls us to come as we are, to come thirsty, to come weary and heavy laden, come while He is still holding His arms wide open, to come and listen to food that satisfies, and that it is FREE!!!! (Read the rest of Isaiah 55 to understand more of this)
So, as I began to think of what I wanted to share in this site, I thought this verse was perfect. I want others to come and see the work of Christ in me, not just here, but in all of my life. I want them to believe that they can come to God with anything, from any place, and trust Him to satisfy. HE WILL SATISFY, with Himself. I pray that others, and I myself, would learn to stop wasting our energy and resources on what does not satisfy, and turn to our free gift in Him, who does. I want my friends, family, and strangers to be able to come and share their life with me, believing that I will not turn them away because I'm too busy or don't approve of their lifestyle. I want them to see this attribute of Christ in me. I hope that God's word will always be the place you come to for its all-satisfying content, no matter where you are coming from, or what you believe you have to offer. I also pray that anything I share here will be reflection of God's message-fruitful and edifying to your soul, as we come and hear of God's work together. I'll leave you with these lines from the song, that reflect Isaiah 55's call to come and listen to all that He has done and will yet do to satisfy.
Come and Listen, by David Crowder Band:
"Come and Listen,
Come to the Water's edge all you, who know and fear the Lord.
Come and Listen,
Come to the Water's edge all you, who are thirsty come.
Let me tell you what He, has done for me.
Let me tell you what He, has done for me.
He has done fo you,
What He has done for us.
Come and Listen,
Come and Listen to what He has done.
Come and Listen,
Come and Listen to what He has done.
Praise Our God, for He is Good.
Praise Our God, for He is Good."
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Saturday, May 9, 2009
PRAY FOR THE INDIANS IN ORISSA
I often get updates from the nurse I worked with in India last summer. It is always a joy to hear from her, but also a sorrow to hear of the trials she and her co-workers, friends, and our fellow brothers and sisters are enduring there. The strange thing is that it doesn't make me thankful I am here in the safety and security, but rather increases my desire to return to serve the people that blessed me so last summer. Please pray for our Christians brother and sisters, and their enemies. Please pray that God would protect them and humble their enemies. Pray that He would send me back some day soon, in the company of others. Please read that link on my page to a Desiring God article that shares an update on the circumstances in Orissa, India. Thank you!
Friday, May 8, 2009
One step forward...
"Two steps, somewhere else." Lately I feel like I'm moving forward, with no real understanding of where I'll end up. Granted, this has been the theme of my life, but at least I always thought I knew where I was going. Now, I have no idea. I returned two weeks ago to Langley, BC for my Universty Graduation Ceremony-where I actually graduated from my program four months ago. As I reconnected with my friends and fellow class-mates, I recalled the fear I felt as I stepped out of my student-role into my professional role-something I'm only beginning to grasp now. I witness all around me the fear and excitement of meeting those long-held dreams fulfilled! And then I realized how far I still have to go. I have many dreams and goals, but stepping forward lately has seemed to move further from those dreams, and towards an unknown world of medicine that terrifies and overwhelms, that I feel completely unprepared and unfit for.
The frustrating thing is that at a very young age, and unusually young age, I knew what I wanted to do with me life: ministry, specifically overseas, and so I've pursued that ever since. But somehow I feel that now, I've been deterred-and it's so frustrating! Even within the field of nursing, I found something that fit so perfectly, where I was fulfilled within, and blessing others for the sake of Christ; yet since I've graduated, I have left that direction to pursue another in hopes that it will prepare me for what's ahead-though I often do not see how.
I hate fruitless travel-I loathe doing anything without purpose... truly. Even relaxation or recreation has purpose-to rest my mind and restore it for the next step forward, the next day. Or a night's rest to process the days findings. The sad thing is how often I find myself distracted into laziness or empty fruitless pursuits-that's when I feel most ashamed and depressed.
Still, lately I feel as though I'm walking down the wrong path, into a hole I can't turn back from. In this case, in an entirely different direction from my dreams, and all that I thought I was. Loyalty is a quality I prize-in other people and myself. Yet now, it seems my loyalty to a hospital and new employers and employees, I fear I'll never be able to leave them to pursue what I've always worked for and believed in. I'm so afraid of giving up my dream of returning to India, settling for something less out of loyalty to the world. I'm scared that if I keep traveling down this road, I won't turn back or move in the direction I want to. I will never live my dreams of working with you in the depths of emotional and spiritual loss, of opening my home to them, and returning to the country that has been on my heart almost half of my life: INDIA.
Praise the LORD that He knows the plans He has for me (Jeremiah 29:11). So often I have wondered at where my decisions will lead me and what ministry God has in store next... and everywhere I've gone, I've found purpose in my life, a place and people to minister to and with. Praise Him that He will keep my path straight, bringing my feet back to the place they stand firm, moving forward before Him-my ultimate end. Praise Him that only in Him do I find my joy, and in so doing, give Him the ultimate glory. John Piper has said, "God is most glorified, when we are most satisfied in Him." Oh Lord, make me satisfied in You, wherever I am, whatever I am doing, that You would be most glorified in me! I'm so thankful for this promise: "And I am sure that God, who began a good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on that day when Christ Jesus comes back again" (Phil. 1:6). And so I will continue in the journey, fighting hard for the Truth I am convicted of daily, hoping and trusting in Him who will never leave, nor forsake us. Whether I have nothing, or plenty, whether I fade into the collage of medicine that consumes me every day, or move forward to minister to the needs of those God so often brings to mind; whether I remain in Spokane my whole life, return to Langley, or move half-way across the world to serve in the villages of India, I know my life is in His hands and for His Glory... and that is all I need to believe and know.
May You find peace in knowing His plans for you are good, and joy in knowing His grace will sustain you, His love dwell within and around you, and His power be ever perfect in your weakness.
The frustrating thing is that at a very young age, and unusually young age, I knew what I wanted to do with me life: ministry, specifically overseas, and so I've pursued that ever since. But somehow I feel that now, I've been deterred-and it's so frustrating! Even within the field of nursing, I found something that fit so perfectly, where I was fulfilled within, and blessing others for the sake of Christ; yet since I've graduated, I have left that direction to pursue another in hopes that it will prepare me for what's ahead-though I often do not see how.
I hate fruitless travel-I loathe doing anything without purpose... truly. Even relaxation or recreation has purpose-to rest my mind and restore it for the next step forward, the next day. Or a night's rest to process the days findings. The sad thing is how often I find myself distracted into laziness or empty fruitless pursuits-that's when I feel most ashamed and depressed.
Still, lately I feel as though I'm walking down the wrong path, into a hole I can't turn back from. In this case, in an entirely different direction from my dreams, and all that I thought I was. Loyalty is a quality I prize-in other people and myself. Yet now, it seems my loyalty to a hospital and new employers and employees, I fear I'll never be able to leave them to pursue what I've always worked for and believed in. I'm so afraid of giving up my dream of returning to India, settling for something less out of loyalty to the world. I'm scared that if I keep traveling down this road, I won't turn back or move in the direction I want to. I will never live my dreams of working with you in the depths of emotional and spiritual loss, of opening my home to them, and returning to the country that has been on my heart almost half of my life: INDIA.
Praise the LORD that He knows the plans He has for me (Jeremiah 29:11). So often I have wondered at where my decisions will lead me and what ministry God has in store next... and everywhere I've gone, I've found purpose in my life, a place and people to minister to and with. Praise Him that He will keep my path straight, bringing my feet back to the place they stand firm, moving forward before Him-my ultimate end. Praise Him that only in Him do I find my joy, and in so doing, give Him the ultimate glory. John Piper has said, "God is most glorified, when we are most satisfied in Him." Oh Lord, make me satisfied in You, wherever I am, whatever I am doing, that You would be most glorified in me! I'm so thankful for this promise: "And I am sure that God, who began a good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on that day when Christ Jesus comes back again" (Phil. 1:6). And so I will continue in the journey, fighting hard for the Truth I am convicted of daily, hoping and trusting in Him who will never leave, nor forsake us. Whether I have nothing, or plenty, whether I fade into the collage of medicine that consumes me every day, or move forward to minister to the needs of those God so often brings to mind; whether I remain in Spokane my whole life, return to Langley, or move half-way across the world to serve in the villages of India, I know my life is in His hands and for His Glory... and that is all I need to believe and know.
May You find peace in knowing His plans for you are good, and joy in knowing His grace will sustain you, His love dwell within and around you, and His power be ever perfect in your weakness.
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