Reckless Abandon Wrapped in Common Sense

Seeing the news this morning about the 200+ lives lost and millions affected by the tornadoes in the Southern US (http://abcnews.go.com/US/tornadoes-210-killed-south-including-131-alabama/story?id=13474955), reminded me of the daily struggle we face living in the end times where we must be ready every day of our lives, and yet we are to live each day just taking one at time. I have always struggled to take one day at a time and not worry about tomorrow, and when disasters like this take place I find it even more difficult to stay in my comfort zone at home instead of being at the front lines of battle. At the same time, I am terrified of those front lines.

As a child I used to say my greatest fear was dying without the people I know and love understanding and believing that I love them, and most of all how Jesus Christ loved them. This greatly impacted the way I interacted with people and formed friendships. Somehow, as I became aware of the terrors of this world and its sufferings, and as I faced opposition and temptation at different seasons of my life, I lost that passion and urgency; fear of worldly circumstances and unknowns slowed me down you could say. Common sense ways of protecting myself began to quiet the urgency I once had.

It seems ironic now when I think about it, that the same natural disasters and growing risk of the world we live in that make me shy away from standing up in Faith and going out in a threatening world, is the same reason why I have this urgency to reach those who have not heard the Gospel. Even so, I know there are practical ways that I need to pursue the equipping of my mind, heart and body for His service wherever He leads me. We can't just run full speed ahead into the thick of the battle without proper training and the Armor of God.

There is a constant tension between the urgency I feel for the lost, especially the broken ones in crisis in India, and the need to rest quietly in His presence and seek training for His future plans for me. Even Jesus Christ took days of quiet away from everyone, by Himself, to pray to the Father, seek His counsel, and waited until the last few years of His life to make His most defining moments of ministry. That doesn't mean that every moment of His life on Earth didn't have meaning or purpose; from the miracle of His birth to His death on the cross the world was against Him, and yet the Power of His victory on the cross and His Resurrection as we just celebrated put His enemies to shame and ours too!

Amy Carmichael cautioned anyone that would come to India, "... you cannot spend too much time with Him alone." She also said this in her famous book "If" -
"If I crave hungrily to be used to show

the way of liberty to a soul in bondage;

instead of caring only that it be delivered;

if I nurse my disappointment when I fail,

instead of asking that to another the word of release may be given,

then I know nothing of Calvary love." - Amy Carmichael, "If"

Processing...

Six months of lessons, challenges, obstacles overcome, fears defeated, victories won...
How does one summarize it or begin to process it all? I think I shall spend the rest of my life on Earth and quite possibly all eternity with Him in Glory enjoying the "light-bulb" moments of His ways far beyond our own. Despite my weakness in Faith, He blessed me in tremendous ways with more of Himself, revealing His purpose for me and for those I lived alongside in my presence there; though most was not what I had planned or expected, all of it was from His hands and for His glory!

As people start asking me, "well how was it?" I feel I could burst! Not one word or even one sentence can sum up the lessons learned, the heart-breaking sights and stories, or His jealous love for India. My hope and prayer is that the needs of those I left behind will continue to be met by His sustaining hand, as He sends more workers into the field and raises awareness of the needs there and the way we can all participate in helping. There is so much need! The sights, sounds, smells, experiences and emotions that overwhelmed me at first, have became a constant echo in my memory; my hope is to be able to share enough of that with you, and the story of each life touched by those serving Him there, that you will not be able to forget these children and this nation in your prayers.

One of my new favorite songs by Casting Crowns has been especially encouraging as I reflect: "Your love is peace to the broken, faith for the widow, hope for the orphan, strength for the weak. Your love is the anthem of Nations, Rings out through the ages, and Your always enough for me... In a dry and weary land, LORD You are the Rain." Pray with me for the "Rain" to fall from His hand on the nations, that His Truth would stand, and that a nation full of pluralism would learn to Love and serve the One True God.

Arriving Home....

Just made it home last night! There is so much to share from just the past week and month, let alone more from the past 6 months. I am not making any promises, but I am going to do my best to post 1-2 times/week to process the past few months and share His work with you all-His gifts and blessings are made to be shared, to the Praise of His Glory! It is such a blessing just to have the freedom to write, e-mail and talk to people in person about the Work He is doing, without fear for myself or those I love.

There are some huge prayer needs for those I left behind, so for now I will ask you to pray as He leads you for peace, safety, health, protection from the enemy who is the prince of this world, and wisdom, strength, and grace to speak the Truth in Love (for me as I share with people here, and for those still in His service there). The staff involved in the intervention program are in need of all our prayers for their eyes to be opened and their lives turned around.

Of course, I need prayers for wisdom and direction of next steps in applying for jobs, school courses, and preparation for future service wherever He leads, strength as I transition to the many differences of life here, Him to keep the people I left behind in my thoughts and prayers while still leaving them safely in His hands, and peace, faith, hope and love in all these things.

My prayer as I share more with people who know me and those who don't, is that their eyes would be opened to the great need for us to be mindful of people around the world who are in need: to hear His Word, have His healing, His provision, and know they are loved beyond measure. I believe with all my heart that this is His position toward India, for that is the only way I could love its people as I do: "Seeing the people, He felt compassion for them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd. Then He said to His disciples, 'The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Therefore beseech the LORD of the harvest to send out workers into His harvest.'" - Matt 9:36-38