Seeing the news this morning about the 200+ lives lost and millions affected by the tornadoes in the Southern US (http://abcnews.go.com/US/tornadoes-210-killed-south-including-131-alabama/story?id=13474955), reminded me of the daily struggle we face living in the end times where we must be ready every day of our lives, and yet we are to live each day just taking one at time. I have always struggled to take one day at a time and not worry about tomorrow, and when disasters like this take place I find it even more difficult to stay in my comfort zone at home instead of being at the front lines of battle. At the same time, I am terrified of those front lines.
As a child I used to say my greatest fear was dying without the people I know and love understanding and believing that I love them, and most of all how Jesus Christ loved them. This greatly impacted the way I interacted with people and formed friendships. Somehow, as I became aware of the terrors of this world and its sufferings, and as I faced opposition and temptation at different seasons of my life, I lost that passion and urgency; fear of worldly circumstances and unknowns slowed me down you could say. Common sense ways of protecting myself began to quiet the urgency I once had.
It seems ironic now when I think about it, that the same natural disasters and growing risk of the world we live in that make me shy away from standing up in Faith and going out in a threatening world, is the same reason why I have this urgency to reach those who have not heard the Gospel. Even so, I know there are practical ways that I need to pursue the equipping of my mind, heart and body for His service wherever He leads me. We can't just run full speed ahead into the thick of the battle without proper training and the Armor of God.
There is a constant tension between the urgency I feel for the lost, especially the broken ones in crisis in India, and the need to rest quietly in His presence and seek training for His future plans for me. Even Jesus Christ took days of quiet away from everyone, by Himself, to pray to the Father, seek His counsel, and waited until the last few years of His life to make His most defining moments of ministry. That doesn't mean that every moment of His life on Earth didn't have meaning or purpose; from the miracle of His birth to His death on the cross the world was against Him, and yet the Power of His victory on the cross and His Resurrection as we just celebrated put His enemies to shame and ours too!
Amy Carmichael cautioned anyone that would come to India, "... you cannot spend too much time with Him alone." She also said this in her famous book "If" -
"If I crave hungrily to be used to show
the way of liberty to a soul in bondage;
instead of caring only that it be delivered;
if I nurse my disappointment when I fail,
instead of asking that to another the word of release may be given,
then I know nothing of Calvary love." - Amy Carmichael, "If"
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